Guess who’s back? Back again? Guess who’s back, guess who’s back, guess who’s back…

Greetings! What are you going to be for Halloween?If you can’t think of anything, there’s always those ghetto Halloween shops that crop up around the city, or of course out-of-the-door queues for $69.99 prepackaged costumes at Ricky’s so that the hip/yupsters and can look hot or fun.

NB was looking good at a Saturday night Halloween/birthday for a former analyst class party near Union Square … as what? I won’t tell!

But we know what kind of tricks or treats we really want — the uselessly material kind. And that’s what I’m here for.

Here’s my current multi-strategy top five:

1. Office Strategy: Sterling-silver binder clips, perfect for all those PIBs (Public Information Books) you’ve got to put together. Because you won’t look good, unless your documents look good.
2. Commuting Strategy: An Orange Hermes Metrocard for the ultimate in stealth luxury. We know Hermes does undercover elite consumption better than anyone else.
3. Eating Strategy: tie between Petits RICHART Intense from RICHART Chocolate or FreshDirect Season’s Pass. If the former, these are your calories for the day - none of the cheap stuff, okay?
4. Identification Strategy: Gucci ID holder. An exciting brown Guccissima print ID holder and a Gucci red and green necklace for a real winning merger.
5. Audio Strategy: that new iPod Shuffle, which I wish wasn’t so delayed. Make sure you have top of line Shure headphones ready and get the new PopArt Pet Shop Boys — look good while at Equinox or the Club uptown.