Could it be that I finally hear something bad about London — namely, that it’s nightlife is starting to suck? M.B. brings our attention to a Times article from early this year on the practice of hypercompetitive clubsumption (yes we’re in a dangerously desperate mood today), whereby the exuberantly rich are spending an average of $7,000 on weeknights and $20,000 on weekends to secure VVVVVViVIP spots at clubs like Movida. And while Movida sounds remarkably like a lamely-named 27th street club, I’m happy to inform you that the club actually belongs to the famed London nightlife scene.

Heady days, these. Describes the Times: “One night, a three-way international champagne battle unfolded, with representatives from Russia, England and Germany fighting for effervescent supremacy. ‘It was like the World Cup,’ [Movida director] Mulholland says: ‘three countries trying to outdo each other by buying more jeroboams of Cristal, at £4,500 a bottle, than the other team.’”

These ballers’ peculiar antics also include ragging Jamie Foxx about his pathetic earnings ($25MM) and subsequently spraying him with Cristal (just read the article). To roll with these guys leave your items of conspicuous consumption at home: these guys are all about being “furtive, stealthy, dressed-down and intensely paranoid.”