Financiers are leaving the city in droves. We compare some of the more popular destinations using a very limited looking glass.

Not that you necessarily have this choice, but we want to pit these against each other anyway.

Access to Skiing: Dubai
Dubai wins out here with Ski Dubai. Hong Kong was supposed to get its own “Snow World” back in 2003, but we can’t find any news of its development so we have to assume that there’s no mall-based equivalent over in HK. Kongers, please update us if this is not true.

Proximity to World Conflict: Dubai
What’s more hardcore, “Yeah, I spent my weekend in Bali” or “Yeah, I spent my weekend in Ramala”? Ask yourself.

Ease of Continuing Your Alcohol and Gambling Addiction: Hong Kong
Yeah um, did you know you can only get alcohol in restaurants and bars in Dubai? Forget about casinos.

Limb-Preserving Ability: Hong Kong
Corporal punishment anyone?

Ease of Cultivating Love Handles: Dubai
Listen, this is a city where it’s actually hard to walk. Chew on that.

Most Preposterous Man-made Dwelling Potential: Dubai
Frankly, I don’t think islands made to shape palm fronds are really that crazy. What about islands shaped as snowflakes? Let’s get some complexity up in here.

Lowest Likelihood of Running Into Brooklyn Hipster: Dubai
Yeah, this is obviously made up but we just can’t see hipsters in Dubai. Unless somehow someone figures out how to love money, but like, in an ironic fashion.

Lowest Likelihood of Seeing Your Fellow, Fired Ex-Coworkers: Hong Kong
You spent years going to the deli with those annoying people. Why not spend years not seeing them?