20 Comment(s)

1. On May 18, 2008, 2L said:

   change “Evaluate” –> “Evaluated”

   Plan I? I thought there was only Plan II.

   Too many “the” in your bullet points. Should be:
   “Analyzed [] fixed income”
   “Audited [] business practices”
   “Evaluated [] existing frameworks”
   “Served as [] main point”

   It may be “University of London,” but it’s “THE University of Texas” — remove the “at Austin.” The change to officially include “at Austin” goes unrecognized by the Longhorn masses.

   RE: Interest — Football = football or Football = soccer?

2. On May 19, 2008, paul allen said:

   nice job misrepresenting your graduate education. first off, univ. london is not a university in its own right, rather it is a federation of 19 colleges and 12 institutes. You might want to specify which one you attended (if you even did).

   second, there isn’t even an MSc program that is called “economics of development” at any of these colleges/institutes.

   so, in a not so clever way, you are trying to trick the person reviewing your resume into assuming that you attended The London School of Economics, which use to be one of the colleges within that federation - they left the federation this year I think. anyway, LSE doesn’t even have this program. i should know as i received my MSc there.

   From reading all of this, I think you are a fraud. I hope the person who is reviewing your resume for an interview catches onto this as well and brings you in for a first (and only) round just to tear you a new one.

   Cheerio.

3. On May 19, 2008, FIgirl said:

   If you’re applying for jobs in London remember to use the British spelling, eg honors -> honours.

   You can probably cut the details about your UT scholarship fund gig. Use the whitespace you save to give more details about what you’re currently studying at University of London.

4. On May 19, 2008, Charlie said:

   I agree with Paul Allen. You sound like you’re lying, and too much of your resume (40%) is taken up by education. If you’re

5. On May 19, 2008, gilding the lily said:

   Paul Allen,

   Actually, you might be surprised to know that one of the colleges affiliated with the University of London does have an MSc program that is called “economics of development.”

   Unfortunately for the applicant, it is with “The School of Oriental and African Studies” of The University of London. Now I understand why he/she was reluctant to put the full name of the program.

6. On May 19, 2008, Horatio said:

   You seem like a smart guy with a decent background. But dude, those are some of the most snooze inducing bullet points I have ever read. Your descriptions are the literary equivalent of hiring a hypnotist to come to my office and swing a watch in my face and say “you are getting very sleeee-peee.”

   Here’s what a bullet point on a resume should look like:

   Created XYZ investment proposal for QRS company leading to 30% increase in ROIC. (cue pyrotechnics)

   BAM!!!!!

   What you did…then, what it did.

   Your bullet points should be like your “greatest hits” collection. Little nuggets of awesomeness that capture the imagination of all who stray withing 100 meters of your resume.

   Instead you give me a bullshit, boring-as-hell, long-as-shit job description that made me, who has read Vanity Fair, Moby Dick, War and Peace, David Copperfield, Anna Karenina and Les Miserables, want to gouge out my eyes.

   Note to all resume writers: I do not want to read a f-ing job description! If you tell me you were an strategy consultant analyst, then guess what? I already know what you f-ing did on a daily basis! Give me the highlights, dammit!

7. On May 19, 2008, Lumbergh said:

   Horatio, you’re right about resume bullet points. But if I were you, I wouldn’t bother telling future job applicants what I’m looking for since nobody wants to work for a tool who fires off a list of books he’s read in an anonymous forum unrelated to literature. You could have made your point without that declasse gesture.

8. On May 20, 2008, Monkey Business said:

   Hey Paul Allen, did you really have dinner with that lawyer or are you dead. My feeble mind is still confused.

   On to the resume. I can neither confirm or reject Paul Allen’s statements about your degree but if he is correct, the chicks in recruiting will definitely figure this out. On of their primary responsibilities is to validate the accuracy of resumes.

   Assuming that the degree is correct, you should get rid of all that stuff you list under your degree from Texas. It makes you sound like a big dork. Just keep the school, the degree and the honors you received. Do you think your thesis is really going to sway anyone? You also need to beef up your summer experiences at the bank/exchange. That is good experience that will help you more than the consultancy. Most bankers don’t even really know what a consultant does (just that McKinsey pays good $). Lastly, you have no shot at a bulge bracket job these days. Do you not read the WSJ? The market sucks. Go for a boutique and what for the next boom.

   later

9. On May 20, 2008, Monkey Business said:

   Obviously that was “wait” for the next boom…

10. On May 20, 2008, paul allen said:

    OK. The MSc program at SOAS (School of Oriental and African Studies) is offically called “MSc Development Economics”. You do not accurately state this on your resume.

    In addition, why go to SOAS? You supposedly studied Financial Economics AND PPE at UT Austin and graduated cum laude (ouch!). PPE is a staple of English education, so what happened? Grades weren’t good enough to get into Oxbridge or LSE?

    Tough luck getting a job out of SOAS - even if you started telling the truth on your resume.

    I have an idea, how about you join the Peace Corps like all your fellow classmates???

    Sorry for being so harsh, but I cannot stand when people lie about credentials. Do you honestly think you can get away with it? Let’s be honest.

    …and to Monkey Business’ quandary: Paul Allen did have dinner with that lawyer in London. It was at The Dorchester on Hyde Park.

11. On May 20, 2008, Sr. Excel Monkey said:

    Will the fraud that posted this resume come out and defend / explain yourself?

12. On May 28, 2008, Fraud said:

    Thanks for your comments. I do attend soas. and for paul allen, i also did get into the programs at oxford and lse, but was kind of put off by being taught by a bunch of ta’s for a masters course so i decided to go elsewhere. thanks for the helpful comments however, i will be incorporating them into the new res and try to make the bullet points a little more interesting.

    cheers,

13. On May 29, 2008, shoegazejames said:

    I’d push the Arabic skills and emerging market experience as that’s where the action these days is. Go for middle east, africa or other “frontier” markets with a boutique. SOAS in this context is OK. Your cv’s more interesting than 90% of US banking cannon fodder who’re getting mown down in the trenches daily…take horatio’s points on board though.

14. On Jun 6, 2008, UT Grad said:

    As a UT business undergrad, there is no “financial economics” degree. Also, I’ve never heard of UT offering PPE—did you really go to UT? Do yourself a favor and name the stuff right or stop lying, because this just looks foolish…

15. On Jun 10, 2008, McCombs Student said:

    I’ll further what UT Grad posted. (1) Financial economics is a class not a degree. (2) The BBA program doesn’t even offer economics, it’s in the school of Liberal Arts. (3) There’s no PPE degree anymore.. So unless you graduated a while ago and everything has changed, this is a little suspect.

16. On Jun 10, 2008, Anonymous said:

    what a lying sack of shit this asshat is…

17. On Jun 15, 2008, too many jokers said:

    “In addition, why go to SOAS? You supposedly studied Financial Economics AND PPE at UT Austin and graduated cum laude (ouch!). PPE is a staple of English education, so what happened? Grades weren’t good enough to get into Oxbridge or LSE?”

    To paul allen….you are a fucking retard. Ok the guy was misleading on his cv, but to make comments like the above, and the fact that you are spending your time dicking around looking up schools in order to prove he is wrong, shows what a loser you are.

18. On Jun 24, 2008, im pissed said:

    WTF! this guy stole my resume format, almost verbatim. except the shitty content is his own. what’s you name fucker? I’d be happy to provide any recruiters with a copy of the original, email me here: deedsofrenown@gmail.com.

19. On Jun 26, 2008, Andrew said:

    Stealing something cannot be verbatim, nor can format. So, I dont think you have too much to worry about.

20. On Jul 2, 2008, peter said:

    whats wrong with SOAS? isn’t it a good uni?

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